Saturday, July 31, 2010

Storm Cell

We are currently hunkered down waiting for the storm to pass. I think there's probably only another 24 hours or so before we can officially announce sunny skies and smooth sailing. And what, pray tell, kind of storm is this?

Why, a shit storm, that's what. The kind that has you stumbling around in the middle of the night doing laundry, uses up all your papertowel, involves liberal use of Lysol Wipes and bathing of dog bottoms. Oh yes ... it's the dreaded run of diarrhea.

What causes this incredibly infuriating event is usually a mystery but this time I think I have a handle on it. A few days ago Leeloo discovered Something Wonderful in the grass on our walks. Wonderful enough to remember it three days in a row. It wasn't the 'I need to roll in this' kind of wonderful, it was the eating kind. Normally I'd assume it was deer poop but because of the effect on her gastric system it was probably something more potent. My imagination has been on lockdown to prevent it from exploring the possibilities but let's just say no one eats anything else while on a walk if I can prevent it.

My first clue to this impending doom was coming home Thursday night to discover Leeloo attempting to climb out of the expen, something she has never ever done before. Her expression said "Get me out of here! Quick!" Once the smell hit my nose I knew why but what I was not prepared for was Boy's tragic condition.

He had been pooped on. And not just that, Leeloo's explosive diarrhea must have been a shock to them both because it was everywhere, all over the blankets and bedding, splattered up Raimi's side and even (gasp!) on the end of his nose. To say he was mortified is an understatement. I believe the common expression is "Just kill me now." He was drooling, cowering against the side of the pen, standing on three legs to avoid stepping in anything and looking at me for all the world as though life itself was ending. To say "Poor Boy!" is inadequate to how badly I felt for him.

Once everyone was outside I immediately grabbed papertowel, water, and Lysol Wipes and set to cleaning up Raimi first.  He seemed most grateful for the removal of the pooh from his nose. Leeloo stood for her cleaning and fortunately the other two didn't get caught in the crossfire. Everything in the pen went into the wash and Leeloo got a tiny bit of oatmeal for dinner.

Bedtime at about 10:30pm with Leeloo and Raimi on the bed. At about 11pm Leeloo started the Worry Walk. You know the one. Increasing levels of consternation and worry because they need to go out NOW and are concerned you won't notice in time. So I launched myself out of bed and Leeloo almost made out to the door in time - she leaked a little on exit - poor Leeloo. I shoved her out to take care of the worst of the issue. Back in again a few minutes later.

An hour later, without warning, she is off the bed and my carpet is covered in Leeloo diarrhea. It's ... tragic. So there I am pulling out the rug, rolling it up and tossing it outside to deal with at a later time. Leeloo spent the rest of the night in what I presume was a fitful sleep. Friday morning her poop was improving and I think we are out of the woods.

Not so. Because on Friday night I see that Esme is not eating her dinner. Huh. An hour later I find a very runny poop in my hall. It's Esme sized. Uh oh. We head off to bed and I think, but do not act upon the thought, that perhaps I should remove the freshly washed dog bed from my room just in case Esme's issue follows the same course as Leeloo's.

At about 2am Raimi is standing next to my bed and I can feel the waves of concern washing over me. I don't know what he wants but he won't walk around to the other side of the bed to lie down. I insist he climbs over me and we sleep. A short time later I wake up and think 'I know that smell'. Sure enough when I turn on the light there is runny poop everywhere. Not on the bed thankfully but all over the floor and the dog bed. More paper towel, more Lysol Wipes, more baggies to package them, and laundry in the middle of the night. I stuff Esme into her crate and crawl back into bed. Fifteen minutes later I am out of bed again cleaning up the vomit from inside her crate. Back into the crate she goes.

Morning brings a beautiful day and more diarrhea. Fortunately it has been contained this time in the crate but on the dog as well. The hairy dog. Outside she goes. Coaxing Raimi out of my bedroom was a bit of a struggle because he didn't believe I had cleaned up the mess from the night before. He finally tiptoed his way to the door and stood drooling outside in a distraught state. He won't eat his breakfast, I presume he's lost his appetite due to the never-ending run of poop he has had to deal with for the last 2 days. Esme got a bath this morning at 7:30am ... so not what 7:30am is designed for.

What is strange but good is that this bug has not affected either dog's activity level or their personalities. Both are happy, cheerful, and apparently unaffected by this issue except when they are suddenly struck by a dire need to 'go'. Leeloo's appetite was not affected at all and while Esme is not eager to eat she is drinking and as naughty as ever. This is not the first time this has struck my household and while I hope it is the last I am sure it won't be given the girl's propensity for finding things to eat on our walks.

Things like this happen. I don't get mad at the dogs, it's not their fault they eat garbage and end up with gut rot. They are dogs. Dogs do things like this and there is almost nothing you can do to prevent it other than not walk them - an option I am unwilling to explore at this time. I do need to learn to follow my instincts though. If I think they are done their explosive stage, they never are and should really be in a contained space in order to minimise the impact on my house and possessions.

I am hoping that Raimi and Archer are free and clear of this particular issue because they didn't eat whatever it was that Esme and Leeloo did. Honestly, if there is trouble in the henhouse, ask the bitches. People often want boys because they think they are tough - own a bitch once and you'll change your tune. They each get into more trouble than both my boys combined.

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