The Ciderhouse Rules

When you are planning for a dog show several things can happen that may result in your not being able to show a dog. These are known as the Rules of Dog shows and are including, but not limited to,:

1) The dog you are planning to show comes up lame. This is the primary Rule of Dog Shows. Lameness can be for any reason, real or imagined. Remember Archer's pano? Remember Leeloo's cut foot? All occurred just prior to a dog show. Fortunately recovery was swift and they were able to be shown but there have been instances where a dog has injured itself while at a dog show resulting in it not being able to be taken in the ring. You are never safe from this rule until the class is over.

2) The dog will experience loss of coat. This is the Secondary Rule of Dog Shows. Coat loss has many causes including, but not limited to, seasonal changes, removal by 'dog pals', coming into heat, scratching, chewing and stuffing themselves under furniture they no longer fit beneath. This rule primarily applies to breeds of dogs with double or long coats but smooth coated breeds have been know to lose large amounts of hair resulting in their show entry being revoked. It is important to note that coat loss is possible the night before a dog show so don't be fooled ... a night spent worrying off the coat of a front leg is a deal breaker for sure. It has happened.

3) The dog will lose weight to such a degree that it is no longer in show condition. The Tertiary Rule of Dog Shows is most often experienced by male dogs who, in the throes of lust and love, stop eating. This causes moderate weight loss and in combination with excessive whining and worrying the state of the dog rapidly deteriorates.

There are more rules but these are the three that you most need to watch out for. It's important to note that it is possible for all these rules to enter into play at one time and that is when you just pack up and head home or don't even bother going in the first place. Which rule applies to me this weekend? Why, rule #2 ... Esme has scratched her coat to such a degree in the last 48 hours to require some fancy trimming to hide the now much shorter coat on her shoulders. Of course she did.